Meditation Forty-One

Groomed for Wildness

You’re a wild thing, don’t you know…

an unspoiled, spirited blossom on the edge.

Within each of us there is a need to push boundaries, to be daring and free, to answer the call of the wild. Some of us, however, have learned that our wildness can lead to trouble, and have turned a deaf ear.

You’ve experienced the volatile, painful side of life. Let your experiences deepen your sensibilities; make you more conscientious and compassionate. Don’t allow them to destroy your passionate nature.

As you strive to create order, cultivate the willingness to risk messes. You are both cultivated and wild. Created and creative. Ordinary and exceptional. You have a right and an obligation to be all that you are.

“For a person to live authentically, her wildness must be harnessed and managed by her tameness but her tameness must be confronted and displaced by her wildness…Wildness is the heat, tameness is the thermostat… A wild person with a calm mind can make anything…”

~Eric Maisel, Fearless Creating

I am a calm, rational, responsible being. I’m also wild, unspoiled and spirited.

I am nurtured. I am natural. I am free.

Meditation Forty-Two

The human imagination…dreams, like a dog in its basket,

of hares in the open.

~John Berger

Trust your instincts. Go with the flow. The most remarkable things will appear.

I would not have intentionally attempted to paint a dog. But as I casually laid in the first few color washes, its basic shape emerged. I considered ignoring it. I was afraid of botching the whole piece. Despite my lack of confidence I proceeded to add color. The result, although not something I believed others would consider extraordinary, amazed me.

~Painter’s Notes

Creating is an exciting, mysterious, natural process, of which we are all a part. We don’t necessarily have control over outcomes. We do, however, have choices.

As you continue to create your recovery, rest assured that there will be some surprises. Trust your instincts. Go with the flow. You can never be one hundred percent certain as to how things will turn out, but if you are true to yourself and the work in front of you, the most amazing things will occur.

I am a labour of love, a remarkable creature born to create. Today I choose to take my place in the creative process, and make the most of what I’m given.

Meditation Forty-Three

Solitude and meditation gave me an awareness, a perspective which I have never lost: that of solidarity with the rest of mankind.

~Vincent Aleixandre

When you look at the painting above, do you sense tranquility or disharmony?

Does the tree seem to be a naturalized part of the landscape? Or alone and out of place?

When the painting was first completed I saw beauty, strength, unity. Several months later, the sight of this lone naked tree made me want to weep. Both times, I had worked in solitude. Only during the latter did I feel alone. Not because there were no other people in my presence, but because I had recently experienced loss. In quiet solitude I recognized that my need, at that time, was to grieve.

~Painter’s Notes

Solitude provides opportunities to putter and ponder, to regain our senses, to recover our selves, to reconnect with the beauty and strength within and all around us.

We are never truly alone. Feeling that way is simply a sign of our humanity, of our need for each other.

In solitude I am free to putter and ponder, to regain my senses, to reconnect.

I am strong. I am beautiful. I am human.

Meditation Forty-Four

To everything there is a season,

and a time for every purpose under heaven.

~Ecclesiastes 3:1

As we grow, we begin to see, think and do things differently.

Life is beautiful. Meaningful. Exciting!

We have, indeed, found something valuable.

There may be times when we feel like we are the only one who gets that.

When our good news is not received with equal enthusiasm, we naturally experience some disappointment. We can even become prickly, defensive, and perhaps judgmental.

It may help to remember that not everyone grows at the same speed. Your new appearance and behaviour may leave others wondering where the person they used to know has gone. Allow them time to adjust, to get to know you as you are now.

As for those you hope to help—share freely what you’ve found, but lay aside expectations. What works so well for you may not suit another. There is no one right way, no perfect means, method or path. The ways are countless. Speeds are variable. The important thing is that you’ve found something that works for you, and are creating your recovery. That, in itself, is beautiful, meaningful and exciting.

Today I choose to live and let live. Everything in its own time. Everyone in their own way.

Meditation Forty-Five

Weeds

Wild. Persistent. Prolific. A weed, by definition, is a plant that grows where it is not wanted. Some are toxic or invasive. Others are simply those that don’t suit our immediate needs and personal tastes.

The process of recovery is much like weeding a garden. We choose what to keep and what to set aside depending on the effect it has on us.

People, places and things that threaten to poison or crowd out that which you hold dear must be guarded against. Be especially vigilant with those that compromise your safety and peace of mind. Some are perennial, and will appear again and again. The good news is that, with practice, you can become quite adept at identifying and rooting them out.

Those that pose no real threat, but have the potential to make a difference in the quality of your life deserve special consideration. In this category are the people, places and things you either seem to have outgrown, or are not yet entirely familiar with. Some hold untapped resources. It may be worth your while to pause and give them another look before a final decision is made. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, a weed is “a plant whose virtues have not yet been discovered.”

The best defense, overall, is a good offence. Become familiar with what you want and need. Infuse your garden with hardy, healthy, vigorous plants. Nurture them. Delight in them. Your weeds won’t stand a chance.

I am the keeper of my garden. Today I tend it with choices that not only reflect my personal tastes and sensibilities, but also those that facilitate my growth.

Meditation Forty-Six

All work is as seed sown; it grows and spreads and sows itself anew.

~Thomas Carlyle

No doubt, getting this far has been a challenge. You’ve dug, seeded, watered and weeded. Sweated, bled and shed a few tears. Your garden has grown. The time for harvest has come.

Celebrate your accomplishments. Reflect and give thanks for all you’ve gained–it is yours to keep, no matter what.

Don’t dwell on disappointments and setbacks. The hard work of past seasons is never lost. It is born and reborn, carried forward in the cycle of sowing, nurturing and harvesting. You will always be a part of the good you have created. It will always be a part of you.

Break open the fruits of your labour. Savour the sweet juices of success. Anticipate the bounty of the future.

Make this moment one of rejoicing.

I now take pleasure in the fruits of my labor, as I will again, and again, and yet again. For all that I have ever been, for all that I am and all that I will become, I am grateful.

Meditation Forty-Seven

Scattered…

To be rooted is perhaps the most important and least recognized need of the human soul.

~Simone Weil

As necessary as it is to explore and take risks, it is equally so to be rooted. We all need an anchor, something to stabilize us when the winds of change blow and scatter our energies.

During major growth spurts, milestones and shifts in personal circumstances, we are vulnerable to losing a sense of groundedness. This is when it’s especially important to reach for the people who provide a sure and steady source of support. They are those who recognize your potential. Understand your limitations. Share your experiences. Respect your boundaries and encourage you. By blood or circumstance, they are your kin. With them, you are home free.

I am both tethered and free—safe, at peace, and most fully myself in the company of kindred souls. With them in my life, I can go anywhere.

Meditation Forty-Eight

I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering.

~Steven Wright

Perhaps, at times, we try too hard.

“Fantasy Forest Overworked” (left) is the product of attempting to force results. Instead of remaining true to my intention to have fun and let the painting lead the way, I became overly concerned with how the piece would appear to viewers. Long after the initial image had been established I was still brushing, dabbing and scrubbing.

Although I was not immediately happy with this piece, I did come to see it as a light-hearted lesson in remaining true to myself. It’s an ongoing endeavour.

~Painter’s Notes

When we remember that our real job is to simply show up and do our part, things have a way of working out. Not always as imagined. Sometimes, even better.

I occasionally get in my own way. I know it, yet I am confident that in spite of myself, I am emerging.

Meditation Fifty

Dear Reader,

We may not know each other, but because you have chosen to follow along with the entries on this site, I know that we have traveled common roads.

Like me, you have faced perplexing and painful situations.

Like me, you have reached out for resolution and peace.

We have come quite a distance together through the first forty-nine meditations. The final three, although I hadn’t originally intended it, now stray somewhat from the previous format. As we close this cycle of meditations, I want to express my wishes for your continued journey.

Be well.

Be free.

Be you.

Abundance is not something we acquire. It is something we tune into.

~Wayne Dyer

May you find, each and every day:

a reason to get up in the morning

a smile when you least expect it

the beat of your heart and a place to dance

hands to hold

your voice

warm feelings that begin in the pit of your stomach and

spread throughout your entire being

sweet memories

everything you need

that all things are possible

and

a miracle

May the grass always be greener on your side of the fence.

I am part of the melody of life. There is nothing I need that I cannot have.